I hope to keep this short. I mean most parents don’t have time to read a lengthy article. With work, keeping a home up, school work and running children to sports practice, etc., it can become a blur.
I knew I wanted to be a mother. What I wasn’t prepared for was how challenging it would be. I thought my love would be enough. When my children were young, I had many days were I felt overwhelmed and ill-equipped. I tried to do everything right. I read books. I ask my peers. I tried to make sure my children had everything they needed.
I wanted my home to be a sanctuary for peace, joy, patience and unconditional love. I also wanted it to be a place of safety and comfort. I’d learn that these moments come when you embrace, allow, forgive, heal and bond. This was a learning curve for me since one usually parents how they were parented and I was raised in a house that had challenging lessons. I often had to step back and think on my parenting style – to make sure it was my parenting style.
To make this simple, I recommend just a few things.
Be available. Your child needs you. Rarely is it when it’s convenient. Trust me though, the timing is perfect. It is for a reason. Don’t ignore these moments. Be present.
Encourage family meditation. Make time on the weekends. Sure a quiet hour would be ideal but allow each to find their own style. Maybe you need to listen to soft music in a dark room while your teen needs to jam out (with ear buds) in their bedroom while another needs to journal or paint. It’s a time to relax and re-group, to come back to your center, your fuel, in your own way. You can also try a group meditation and then discuss it afterwards. Grow together.
Encourage playing, singing and dancing with life. Encourage thinking outside the box and creativity. Encourage freedom. Ah, this might make a parent nervous but trust that your child is not going to go totally unrespectful wild and crazy – I’d bet you raised them better than that… or maybe there is a lesson in their behavior. Have discussions on what feels right to say, “yes” and “no” to.
Look at your home. Does it reflect peace, harmony and tranquility? Does it reflect you and your family? Making a few small changes in your home can dramatically raise the energy level. Let go of a few things… the clutter. It is your mirror. Paint a room a happy color, start a small garden or bring a plant in. Yes, if you have time, you can go all out and feng shui your home but this is not always needed – be realistic.
Know that your child chose you. What an honor. They knew you wouldn’t be perfect. Just perfect for them. They knew you’d teach them and that they’d teach you. Remind them of their inner being. Their inner goodness. Often this can be done by giving a smile… a hug, a calm look into their eye… a reminded to breathe. This is love. And yes, love is enough!
If your reading this, know that you’re a wise and loving parent. Know that you are right where you need to be, doing just what you should be. If that statement doesn’t settle well with you, then question and take action to align to your being and purpose in this life. You can do this. Enjoy parenting!
(You can also watch my YouTube on Spiritual Parenting for more of my thoughts on the parenting journey.)