At times I pause as I start to write. I know that I am a channel and to pass along information. A perspective and I know that there are many. So this topic felt a bit, taboo since I was raised and do believe in caring for our elders. Yet it was brought to my attention that many in the spiritual healing arena are of an age where they will be called upon to provide care for their parents or an extended family member. And many of these healers became healers through being birthed to parents and families who did not believe in or care to understand healing and what they might refer to as, woo woo spiritual matters. It was their role to stay asleep. The experiences though, that a healer endured and survived, can range from a general misunderstanding to outright abuse. For some, they had to learn from the confusing, I love you yet I will also hurt you. If you’re reading this, you know that love shouldn’t hurt.
So… a healer might very well have healed and now feel that this is a part of their journey. An opportunity for a second (or third or 100th) chance to have a relationship and bond.
I’ve never heard it so clear as when Matt Kahn says, “Abuse means that a soul contact is complete. DONE.” Wow. Yet what if you don’t label it as an abusive relationship? Maybe just, misunderstood, strained or dysfunctional?
Well, I believe the point of this message from Spirit is to remind others that there is no wrong choice. You do have free will. To encourage others to search their heart. To release any fear or guilt. To know and then, move forward. The Universe will bring situations to you so that you can continue to heal. Are you doing what is best for you? The answer to this question might be different each time you ask. Or are you repeating a cycle? Potentially of co-dependency and abuse?
For some healers, you might have already been the parent/caregiver. If so, this is definitely a repeating life lesson. How can you evolve in your decision now? Or are you making a decision in an attempt to right a wrong? You don’t have to be a caregiver to release guilt for what worked out as it was intended to. Often loved ones push us away so that we can find love. We have to turn inward verses outward in seeking approval. Know that you didn’t come here to be punished or exhausted. Awakening happens so that you wouldn’t continue to have painful experiences.
So, yes… maybe this is one of many reasons why one should care for their elder. It is a rite of passage; an opportunity to awaken. Often one reviews life and deals with matters of death. Yet at times caregivers become so emotional and exhausted, they miss this wonderful opportunity.
So check in with yourself before your mind lets you make automatic decisions. See if this is a level playing field. Meditate. Can you serve without doing it from a place of feeling obligated, threatened or trying to make up for something that happened in the past? Who you serve, can’t hold power over you. Can you accept your parent/family member and that they might not accept or understand you?
Other questions that might help to ask are:
- Can you provide the care and keep your life balanced? This is important!
- Can you be a caregiver… knowing you are not to control how the relationship plays out?
As a healer, we feel called to serve. Yet… maybe you have changed to a point that you can see another way to care and be a care giver. Yes, at times by placing some space. Possibly through energy work. Remember that you came here to wake up and grow into a healthy and high vibration. Use your power.
You might realize that the one that needs care is… you. And there is nothing wrong with this. You might feel under obligation to be a sole/soul caregiver yet what resources are available to you? Other family members or friends? Community resources? Think outside the box.
Now, can caring for a parent/family member be a privilege, an honor and hold amazing moments? Absolutely! It is an invitation that one should seriously consider. Assisting one to the other side is possibly the greatest work one can do. I can’t say that many are ready for this and you just do the best you can. In love.
I feel as if I could write more on this topic and I hope that by reading this, something is stirring in you; an emotion, a thought, something that resonated. Know that in the end, it all works out. Just as it was intended. Consider what you agreed to before you came into this life. Know that on the other side, all there is, is love.